Moment of Clarity

So. Last night I'm watching my favorite show on how to deal with my family.It was an episode that featured my all-time favorite interventionist, Jeff Van Vonderen.

Note: I am an avid fan of both Lost and Weeds. I couldn't name the main characters on either of them if you threatened me with a tree frog. Intervention though -- I can tell you the addicts, the addictions and the interventionists.

From the clips the producers choose to feature of Jeff, I can tell he's brilliant. Or at least he has moments of brilliance that are conveniently captured on film and broadcast to A&E's audience.

I've learned something from Jeff Van Vonderen in every episode he's been featured in and last night was no exception. In the second half of the show, Jeff met with Brad's family in a "pre-intervention" where they discussed their plan of attack for the actual intervention. Brad is an Iraq War veteran who has turned to alcohol and marijuana in an attempt to numb the pain from his experience as a soldier. His family is tortured and is stuck between wanting to coddle him and love him because of what he's been through and frustration and fear about his addiction and the accompanying behavior. I didn't get Jeff's advice down verbatim but here's the gist:

Brad is an addict, but you guys are addicts as well. When Brad is being good and making promises you mood-alter up. When he's breaking promises and being scary and doing risky junk you mood-alter down. Brad is your mood-altering substance. You need to get sober from him without waiting for him to get better first.

Your message to Brad should be, "We are going to be well whether you are well or not." Right now Brad gets to have his addiction and then pass the pain and consequences on to all of you. When that stops and he has to deal with his own problems, he'll be more inclined to get better.

And I had another breakthrough moment of clarity courtesy of cable television.

F Train Haiku

Swipe as F departs
To get to sit, definite
Trains arrive in groups

I'm Switching It Up.

Hi everyone. Recently I've been doing research on how to switch from blogger to my own domain.

From what I can tell, and from knowing how limited my website-related knowledge is, this is going to take place in steps.

Step one. I'm changing the name. The web address will remain the same until I figure step two out. I'm also pressuring my designer girlfriend to get to designing something fantastic for me.

However, that may take some time as she is currently obsessed with both her new bike and how we drill into the brick wall so we can install our new Elfa shelves. (Warning. If you see Erica, do NOT ask about her new bike unless you have a minimum of 40 minutes to spare. Add another 40 if there is a computer with internet nearby.)

Swedish Style + Red Hook Brooklyn

Ikea has finally opened in Brooklyn! Every weekday morning for months I have been looking out the train window of the elevated section of the F between the 7th Avenue and Carroll Street stops and sighing.

I love Ikea. The big blue building with the bright yellow beacon ... IKEA. It calls me. I saw Ikea in Rome once and almost had a heart attack. I had to restrain myself. How would I ever get an affordable, yet cool, chair on the flight home?

Ikea and I first met when I moved to New York in 1998. I had started doing some freelance work in the event industry with my friend who was in charge of purchasing decor and office supplies for our company. I'd usually be hired for the big excursions -- Home Depot, Ikea -- because I had nothing else to do and I can carry heavy things. The first time we visited Ikea I almost collapsed. It was like when I first met Target.

You mean stuff can be affordable AND stylish? Thank you SB!

It was like a prayer had been answered that I hadn't even dared to pray.

Well, since that day -- we were in New Jersey, the closest Ikea to the city -- I started praying for Ikea in Brooklyn. And it's finally here. People camped outside the doors for three days prior to the opening. No shit. Ikea had lured them in with the promise of crazy give-aways. The first 35 in the door got a free sofa!What I want to know is that if you already had a sofa that you were happy with, could you trade in your free sofa for a gift certificate? $300 goes a long way at Ikea. You could have swedish meatballs for a year with that kind of dough.

Of course, I guess that if you're willing to camp out on the paved shores of Red Hook for three days to get a couch (three workdays, by the way), you're probably pretty serious about that couch.

New York Stranger Love

I didn't realize it was supposed to rain until the man with the black plastic shopping bag tied to his head got on the train. As he sat across from me I also noticed that he was wearing a black poncho. But not your standard, major league sports arena poncho. It was made of poncho material -- plastic poncho snaps and all -- but it was designed like a trench coat.

When he got on the train I thought, "Dammit. I forgot my umbrella," and I went back to my sudoku game. He pulled out the NY Times and started making notes in the business section.

At one point our eyes accidentally met and I smiled, said, "Good Morning" and looked back to my puzzle. He said something I didn't understand.

Excuse me?

(Smiling with the biggest 4-toothed smile ever)
You are a natural beauty.

It was the sweetest moment. And thinking about it now still makes me all warm and fuzzy.

Only in New York.