southern discomforts

This tying your pants to your shoes thing has been going on a while. And I've thought a lot about it. It bothers me. It bothers me the same way that little tag so many of the Timberland wearers leave attached to their laces bothers me. Or that fucking size sticker on baseball caps. Seriously. What is that? Though,
I'm learning not to care so much, even if it doesn't make any sense at all.

Now. This pants-to-your-shoes thing, I get. One. You keep your pants from being stepped on in the back. Two. You let everyone see your super cool shoes. It isn't the most aesthetically pleasing fashion trend, in my opinion, but whatever.

So, sitting across from this guy with his jeans strapped to his Timbo's, I started thinking about how one would get one's pants tied to one's shoes. You know, I remember the eighties when we were into the skinny jean thing and I would have to step on my pants in order to pull my feet free from them at night. Or when my Gloria Vanderbilts were so tight that I would lie on my bed and pull the zipper up with a pair of pliers. So, I am well acquainted with the private humiliations we suffer for fashion.

But now, all I can think of is that guy sitting on his bedroom floor in his underwear and sneakers with those jeans around his ankles while he tied them to his boots this morning.